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Crying Out For Consistency

“If the burden seems to much to bare, remember, the end will justify the pain it took to get us there.” -Relient K
 
    As I write this blog, we are nearing 1 month here in Cambodia. This month has been hard. The hardest month on the race for sure. Our mentor Tim put it well over a phone call in which he said “In terms of The World Race, Costa Rica was like going to the mall, but you’re not at the mall anymore.” I couldn’t have put it better myself. 
    Costa Rica was hard, there’s no denying that we had struggles and trials to overcome during our time there. However, we knew we were spoiled. We had everything we could want and more. Walmart, Starbucks, Subway, and McDonalds, were a 15 minute walk away from our base or less. 
 
 
 
The weather was incredible, the environment wild, and the views breathtaking. 
 
 
 We ate 3 meals a day at home, either made by us, or cooked by a wonderful woman named Xinia. 
 
 
We had our own bus driver, Alfredo, who would take us to ministry anytime we needed. 
 
We had amazing base leaders, and alumni team leaders, who helped our teams through anything we needed. 
 
 
The language barrier wasn’t much of an issue comparatively, because we had Brandon, Tati, and many others on our squad who spoke a little spanish, or could understand it. Not to mention many Costa Ricans spoke or understood English very well. 
    
    Costa Rica was beautiful, we had all our friends together, we had everything we wanted or needed, our ministry was amazing; I could go on forever talking about the blessings we had there. 
 
 
  Now join me in the present. And before I go off sounding pessimistic, I am aware that we are still blessed beyond belief to be here and have the opportunity to partner with our ministry. These are just some of the struggles we are going through. 
  
  Since we arrived, it has been go, go, go. Ministry began just 2 days after we had flown on 5 different planes for roughly 30 hours, across the world, adjusting time zones constantly, sleeping in foreign places, our bodies didn’t know what was going on. Many of our teammates have been sick since being here due to the immense change and exertion we are experiencing. (I would also like to express that the illness, and exhaustion we are experiencing are not due to our ministry hosts, or The World Race not taking care of us. We have everything we need provided for us, and we are not being overworked.) We are just experiencing change that most of us have never experienced in our 18-21 years on this planet. 
 
Differences in Cambodia:
  • We are on a 12+ hour time difference from the U.S. 
  • It is extremely hot and humid (which makes sleep difficult and uncomfortable)
  • The language barrier is extremely real
  • The food is very different
  • It is unfamiliar to the U.S. in almost every way
  • I believe more than 90% of the population is Buddhist, therefore Christians are an extreme minority
 
    That all being said, yes this place is foreign, and uncomfortable compared to our coddled lives at home. We have so much comfort in the United States that people here would never be able to dream of. And that’s not a bad thing, but it’s a reality. 
 
We have incredible ministry hosts, and squad leaders who are leading us through the valley as best they can. It’s a general consensus that we are all exhausted. But that is where our dependence on God grows. Many times we are so tired that we don’t want to even think about going to ministry, and that is where we are able to ask God to give us strength, and help us to put on foot in front of the other, and do the hard things. We came here to serve, and it is becoming apparent that being on The World Race is a choice. Everything you do here is a choice, you can choose to buy in, serve, and push your limits, or you can choose to do the bare minimum and run from brokenness and growth. 
 
 
I have struggled with all of these things since being here. Desiring to be home, and numbing my pain with movies, junk food, or sleep. I am conscious that I have been coping, however I chose to cope because it was preferable to affliction. 
 
 I am constantly brought back to the book of Job in times of trouble. One of the verses on my heart recently has been Job 2:10 “Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?” This is a part of the journey folks. It can’t always be fun, and enjoyable, and everything you want it to be. Sometimes you are standing on the mountaintops, sometimes you are in the valleys, it all belongs. But we are called to press on. Then Jesus said to his disciples, “if anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.” Matthew 16:24-25. 
 
I came to a breaking point the other night where I needed to yell at God, and cry out to Him because I had been here in Cambodia without Him. It got hard, and I chose to turn from Him rather than pressing in. I am constantly humbled and thankful for His grace, because it makes life not fair. And that is what we need in this life, because if life were fair Jesus wouldn’t have died on the cross to save us. 
 
All this being said, yes, Cambodia is hard, it is uncomfortable, however my faith in God’s goodness far outweighs the momentary struggles I am experiencing. He is good through it all, and I know that this is all a part of his plan. 
 
If you are wondering how to pray for me, I would greatly appreciate prayer for peace to be in my life. Peace that transcends all circumstance and understanding. That is the desire of my heart. 
 
“Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is unseen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” 2 Corinthians 4:16-18. 
 
Song Recommendation: Let it all out – Relient K
 
Love you all, and thank you for being with me. -Justin
 
 
 
I also have a 3 part video series in the works of our travel from Costa Rica to Cambodia. 
 
Here is part 1:
 

14 Comments

  1. Amen and Amen!!!!!! I am so thankful for your honesty and your witness to turn back to the LORD. He will give you His peace as you seek Him and He will fill you up as you spend time in His presence. We care about you and are praying for you!!!!! See you soon!

  2. Justin! You have uncovered a profound truth, that BEING on the World Race is a choice (even if one is already physically present on it). Embracing each challenge by pressing into your faith and pressing on with the journey requires courage and genuine self-awareness. Your insight into the struggle is inspiring and I want to encourage you that there is no victory without the struggle. God uses it all for His good. The World Race is really a microcosm of the Christian life we all live, although on the WR growth is accelerated because it is SO intense.

    “…let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus…” Hebrews 12:1,2

    Be of good courage, Justin!! And may Peace be your ever-present companion on this journey.

  3. Justin I just read your words and am overwhelmed with emotion and tears. You are such an incredible writer and videographer. You have such a gift! I am praying for peace and rest for you and your friends. You very thoughtfully wrote about your struggle and your reliance on God. It is so hard for me to watch you struggle and yet I know with discomfort comes growth and a deeper faith. I can already see the growth in your words. I am beyond proud of you and I know this was what God wanted for you! We are also being blessed through your experience. Your have given me many thoughts to ponder and have strengthened my relationship with God. Don’t doubt that you are making a difference, not only where you are but here at home. I love you so very much!

  4. He’s stretching you. Molding you. Breaking you. Growing you. Yet carrying you through it all. I’ve heard how hard Cambodia has been for so many of you. Continue to depend on the Giver of life. He is there in the midst of it all. Much love and many prayers!

  5. Thank you so much Tim and Karen! I know that He will take care of me through anything! Can’t wait to see you guys soon!

  6. Thank you so much Mrs. Folsom, it is becoming a reality that life is not without it’s struggles, and however difficult they are, God will not allow them to overtake you. You are able to stand up under anything if you are willing to say “yes” to God. Thank you so much for your support.

  7. Love you so much Aunt Suzie, I agree that however hard it is to go through these hardships, there is beauty in it all. I am able to appreciate the good moments even more. And I truly know that God is helping me through it all, because I could not do it on my own. Love you so much and I will be praying for all the sweet things you are worthy of in life to come into fruition. Love you!

  8. Yes, He is doing all of those things, and they are brutally beautiful. I can do nothing on my own, and when things go wrong and are out of my hand I must praise God because I am able to lean into Him dependence! Thank you for reading!

  9. Oh Justin, your blogs and videos always bring us joy and help to fill in the gaps with the little bit of information that we get from Nathan along the way. We’re looking forward to parts 2 and 3 of the videos!

    Absolutely, I am honored to be praying for peace for you in this challenging season; thank you for being real about the struggles and challenges you are facing. And I must say it tells me a great deal about your character that you would go so far as to defend your organization and leaders. It is human nature to “point the finger” and shift blame with any level of suffering or hardship that we endure, and I appreciate your honest disclaimer that none of that is necessarily the “fault” of anyone; it’s just hard. You are a man of integrity, wise beyond your years. No doubt, your attitude spills over onto your teammates, and those whom you are serving. It is a testament to Christ in you. Continue to be a strong light of Christ, even when it’s hard.

  10. Justin, I haven’t been on my iPad for several days and didn’t see your message about Cambodia and all your travels. As your Grandma I would like to take you in my arms and give you rest! I know in my heart that Christ is there with all of you and plans to give you peace and rest in your ministry. I can see you growing as a man and so appreciate all the work you put into your words and videos. It is a talent I haven’t seen in you before World Race came into your life. I am so proud of you and appreciate your honesty about the struggles. I certainly will be praying for peace for all of you! God bless my young man!

  11. Thank you so much Mrs. Chandler, I appreciate your kind words and for treating me like your own son. The family of Christ is so strong and beautifully made!

  12. Thank you so much grandma, I’ve been praying for you and thanking God all the time for how loving and caring youve been over the years. Remember you are His daughter and He loves you so much!

  13. Every season of life gets to points of challenges like this. Embrace them but don’t sit in them. Im encouraged by the humility and honesty with which you approach the more difficult parts of the race

  14. Justin,
    You are so mature in your faith, your words are profound. I will be praying for peace for you!
    Love,
    LaRee

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